“Authenticity is everything!” What does that actually mean? Does that mean that we have to achieve perfection, always being a person of high character? Does it mean we have to know everything and have perfected all skills in this work before we can be effective at life and relationship?
The reality is, we never will achieve a societal definition of perfection and there are many things about our past that we hold onto that we use to define us.
Well, STOP IT – stop thinking you have to be perfect to be happy! Stop thinking you have to know the “WHY” of everything that happens. You’re thinking about this in a way that is keeping you stuck. Let’s get unstuck! Be the ‘yourself’ you want to be, create your story, and live in the NOW! Authentically.
How to get ‘unstuck’
There are some things to remember when hearing things like “Authenticity is everything” or “Just be yourself”:
- One must be able to forgive yourself – otherwise that “love for yourself” part of the equation will be severely lacking.
- One must be able to release judgement about oneself.
- One must remember that anyone’s journey is as unique and valuable as any other’s journey.
- We are each a product of our own belief system.
- Each of us is greater and wiser than we appear to be.
- Each moment describes who you are, and gives you the opportunity to decide if that who you want to be.
Forgive – Every experience we have is determined by what we know at the time, the energy we had during the experience, and what we felt was best for us in that moment. You may not have got it “right” when you look back, yet there are no mistakes. You learned something. Forgive yourself, you were doing what you knew to do at the time. Learn from it, and then put it in the past where it belongs. Only a fool apologizes for something for the rest of his/her life. You can’t get that moment back. Apologize, forgive yourself, and then move on.
Release Judgement – to love oneself, one must be willing to stop the shame spiral about themselves. You are perfect in the respect that you are unique unto yourself. There has never been a “you” and there never will be again. There is no measurement that makes sense on yourself against yourself. Right now is all you have, so make the choice to make and be yourself proud of yourself right now. The longer we worry about our ‘worthiness’, the longer we stay stuck.
Get movin’! 😉
Your Journey – no one has experienced what you have experienced, and no one ever will. Be proud of getting here! Reject anyone else’s judgement on your situation. You’re still alive and able to make the choice to either live a hero’s journey or to give up, in which case you’re already dead. We either grow or we die. Choose to live, there is so much left to experience…so much power left to express.
Our Belief System – make the choice to be proud of the person who’s looking back at you in the mirror. If we believe we are a victim or if we believe we are a hero, the choice is ours, and we determine our outcome. The only real true freedom we have in this life is to choose how to think about something. This gets really confusing for people who think they must know the “truth” of themselves to be authentic. The reality, the “Truth”, is that what we think about ourselves is the only truly authentic thing we can experience. Choose to love the person in the mirror – you’re the only one that can fully do that.
“Destiny is no matter of chance. It is a matter of choice.
It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved”
~ W. J. Bryan
Our Greatness – You are uniquely made. You have gifts in the rarest combination of anyone that has or ever will exist. Find your brilliance! Believe that you are already great, and your wisdom will lead you to that greatness. It does not happen the other way around. Believe you are the statue inside the rock that needs chipped away instead of an ugly rock that needs to be molded into something of worth. You’re already great – find yourself.
So, is now a good time?
Yes! Right NOW – You’ll never get this moment back. Be proud of yourself now and love how you wish to live right now. Every moment is a brand-new life. Carpe Diem! Be the author of your life instead of letting it get written by chance. This is both the simplest and hardest thing to do, yet it’s the only choice you have. Live or die. Right now…now….now…now…make your life extraordinary! Lead with curiosity! Stop beating yourself up – choose to love yourself – be love and love purposely.
It really is that simple – Make the choice to love yourself, and live in this moment. It’s sometimes the hardest thing to do, however. I know, personally, I hire a coach to help me see myself when I refuse to do so.
To be AUTHENTIC according to what others tell us reality is is self-defeating, and we’ll actually never know if we’re there. Create your own story, the person you WANT to be, and the life you WANT to live and be AUTHENTIC to that – stop spinning in circles. You can do this, if you choose to.
Do you have questions about this or would you like to explore life coaching? Give me a call and we’ll talk about our choices. I guarantee no one will ever see you the same. I believe in your perfection…your completely flawed perfection. I love that.
Just a quickie here to let you know I Love You!
Jason Bradberry
